Gender

When I first read/heard that gender is just a label, I never really processed it. The first thing that popped up in my head is the infamous painting done by Rene Magritte, The Treachery of Images. In Magritte's painting, the image of a pipe is not a pipe. The painting of a pipe only represents a pipe. Magritte tries to emphasize the difference between a word and what it represents and the existence of a disparity between the the representation and the object itself. When we say the word male and female, we do not necessary think of the genitalia, but what a female should behave, wear, appear (on the outside), and be treated; likewise for male. Gender carries with it a set of social norms that "defines" the sex: a set of social criteria.

But what does that mean? How does it translate to the real world? It's often easy to understand the meaning of an idea, in this case, Magritte's personal and subjective understanding of labels and representations. But how disconnected is gender from sex?

As a social experiment and the need for male attention (sigh, long story), I posted two ads on craigslist as a gay guy and a cross-dresser. The responses I got were surprising in that the demeanors and vernacular used were completely different. Overall, the responses received for the cross-dresser post were generally nicer, friendlier, and more "gentleman-like" than the one line responses for the gay post, "I want you to suck my big dick." Note, both groups know I am biologically male. Let's, for the moment, assume that the female sex is higher up in the hierarchy of sexual relations than their opposites (due to the risk of becoming pregnant); females tend to be treated better in sexual relations than their male counterparts. The friendlier responses from the cross-dresser post were the result of my female gender, despite my biological male sex.